Post by GIDEON 'THE TORCH' WILLIAMSON on Apr 11, 2011 16:14:20 GMT -5
Gideon "The Torch" Williamson
"did you all see that? because i will NOT be doing that again!"
"did you all see that? because i will NOT be doing that again!"
Twenty-Nine-Captain-Egotistical-Easily Agitated-Drunkard
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mind explaining why you're called the torch?
because i'm a bloody attractive ginger! why else would i be called the torch? i will admit it might be because of my brilliance, but it is because of the hair. i got the nickname when i was six years old. i was a teeny mite with a nice shock of ginger hair. my captain at the time–a peg-legged gentleman whose name i cannot recall–called me the torch. at first i didn't really appreciate it, who would? but it has grown on me and i appreciate it now.
how can people take a ginger pirate seriously?
BLOOMING IDIOT, I AM A BRILLIANT MAN. i once escaped a sinking ship using only a knife and a monkey leg. i have earned my well-known respect and you, ignorant thing, have no right to doubt my skill!
brilliant man? really? explain the red mark on your cheek.
a barmaid in tortuga slapped me for being "fresh". a minor setback in my attempts to woo her. i will impress her next week by leaping off a roof into the sea. oh, yes, the feisty lass will be mine.
women on ships? good luck or bad?
depends on their age. young lasses under the age of seventeen are fine. over the age of seventeen, they're bad luck…unless they be stark na…without clothes, then they be mounds of lovely luck.
are you going after the treasure?
OF COURSE I'M GOING AFTER THE TREASURE! i've been a pirate since i was four years old. i have been on more ships than i can remember. i have become a captain, i have been slapped by anything from monkeys to men to mermaids.
liar. you've never even seen a mermaid.
SHUT YOUR HOLE. you are not to touch me rum now. now shoo.
will you allow girls to work on your ship?
i will allow two young lasses to work on me ship. i don't want women of curvier stature on my ship. they have a habit of getting in the way and slapping me…and they don't agree with my philosophy of what they must do to not be bad luck.
stop drinking. it makes you a bad captain.
GET OUT OF MY SIGHT.
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SKIPPY!
